Online Vs. Offline Mike Part Two

Two weeks after the last hangout, Mike and I saw each other again for a night of drinking and dancing. I was on official business, though. A newfound friend of mine just came out. And well hey, with a boy toy by his arm. I, and five other girlfriends came that night to support him. There we were: Mike, my beards, my newfound friend and me.

[Moments after the last encounter with Mike, the flirtatious chats and text messages resumed. I was attracted to him immediately.]

Mike and I were back to our platonic selves. The banters: friendly. The touch: friendly. The look: friendly. One more friendly gesture we do could lead to us gaping at the latest winner of America’s Next Top Model while braiding each other’s hair. I could not stand it. Worst, he had his game face on again. Ugh!

What I learned from the last time was never to compromise myself for Mike or else I would end up getting bored. Even in the company of my friends, I could get bored and yawn my way out of that scene. I had to get the next best entertainment – me, alcohol-ed. As soon as I finished a bottle, two of my gal pals already made it to the ledge. They reached for my hand. I was really tempted to go up there and dance. For those who didn’t know, I would always make it a point to bust a move in a manner that everyone would notice. But that night for some reason, I pretended to be shy. Offline Mike, who professes his hate for people who danced on ledges, stopped me.

Also, I didn’t want to make him feel like an outcast and the music was mediocre, too. We stood there for the first hour but occasionally he would leave me. Either to look for his friends or to look for “food.” After that he was gone for a long time. I was just glad that I could breathe. I was half-drunk already and the party was starting. I went up to the ledge but I was always looking out for offline Mike all the while. Bummer.

[Truth is, I am afraid it would destroy all my chances of getting him if he sees me Britney-dancing on the ledge]

When I was already sweating as if I were on a beach, I stepped down. My friends and I went out for a smoke. Lucas was there with his boyfriend, Jaime. Jaime told me offline Mike went home to do a number 2! HAHAHAHAH!

[To this day, Mike doesn’t know that Jaime told me he went home to take a dump.]

I didn’t think that he’d be back so I just went along my drinking and dancing. When he came back though, he texted “I am back with a new do.” I said to myself, “did he just shave his head?” Then, I saw him he just parted his hair sideways. I was already drunk so I didn’t give a damn about the new do. But for some reason, I felt in heat. All of a sudden, I really wanted to pin him down or plant one on him. Ack!

It’s official. I really like him – online or not. What was wrong during the last time was this: I like Mike more than he likes me and I hate it that’s why I just go halfway with him. I block all moves that will translate – YOU ARE RISKING IT ALL. If this is really it, then it’s sad.

As soon as that realization set in, I told my friends that we should go home. By then, I had lied to them and said I didn’t feel a thing when in fact, I really did feel something familiar. I am back in love again with Mike and that love is no longer that of a certain 19-year old boy. I thought to myself, I could really care for this person for a long period of time. It hurts though that at present, I cannot still get him: all of him.

I searched for him. And I hugged him goodbye. I kissed him again in the same spot (near his lips), at the apple of his right shoulder and at the middle of his back. He just patted my back and went back to the dance floor.

Internally, I was bit crushed but I was glad to have had validated what I have been feeling.